Sabercat Dolls: The Hottest Women in Prehistory!
By ReelzChannel.com Staff
Stone Age women aren't known for their beauty, and yet what red-blooded Homo Sapien wouldn't propagate the species all night long with any of these five evolutionary exceptions? They didn't need push-up bras or fancy dresses to achieve perfection either, just a steady diet of dinosaur shanks and the occasional mud bath. So give credit where credit is due -- if it weren't for these ladies, you may not be alive today. |
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EVOLET / Camilla Belle
10,000 B.C.
Greatest contribution to the gene pool: Eyebrows even a wooly mammoth would envy.
Stone Age beauty secret: Extrusive igneous rock makes a great exfoliant.
Hair-care regimen: Combs once a year with a stick.
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LOANA / Raquel Welch
One Million Years B.C.
Greatest contribution to the gene pool: Prototypical hourglass figure, one million years before hourglasses actually invented!
Stone Age beauty secret: Ratty squirrel-pelt bikinis are surprisingly slimming.
Hair-care regimen: First woman in history to have her own stylist?
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LANA / Barbara Bach
Caveman
Greatest contribution to the gene pool: Cheekbones sharper than any paleolithic axe.
Stone Age beauty secret: Only accessorize with mammal bones! Reptile bones are so last millenium!
Hair-care regimen: Damp cave air naturally repairs split ends.
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IKA / Rae Dawn Chong
Quest for Fire
Greatest contribution to the gene pool: Taut lissome haunches plus no interest whatsoever in modern fads like clothing.
Stone Age beauty secret: Extreme goth make-up.
Hair-care regimen: Why go to the salon when you can just soak your locks in Cro-Magnon muck?
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AYLA / Daryl Hannah
Clan of the Cave Bear
Greatest contribution to the gene pool: Strapping Teutonic pulchritude.
Stone Age beauty secret: Ugly friends make you look even hotter!
Hair-care regimen: Impossible to get hair that lustrous without a little stearamidopropyl dimethylamine -- apparently Pantene Pro-V Daily Moisture Renewal invented much earlier than paleontologists have estimated.
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Who's your favorite Sabercat Doll? Did we miss any? Add you comments below: