A Charlie Brown Christmas: Time for a Hollywood Remake?

Every holiday season, we plop ourselves down on the couch and snuggle in our favorite cathode security blanket, A Charlie Brown Christmas. It's warm, it's familiar, it's, well, getting a little tattered around the edges, isn't it? After all, it was made in 1965! And 43 years without a remake or at least a face-lift in Hollywood? Good grief! That just isn't done.

If we had one Christmas wish, we'd like to see a new version. And not just for TV -- the Peanuts gang hasn't graced the big screen since 1980's Bon Voyage, Charlie Brown -- stop thinking small, Charlie, it's time to step up and take your rightful place alongside Peter Parker and Bruce Wayne.

Now we come to the touchy part: While it would be sacrilege to tamper with the signature Peanuts animation style, it would be box office suicide to put it up against Pixar's latest holiday blockbuster. Forget philosophical depth; today's audiences want visual depth. Thus, live-action seems like the way to go. And as long as we're changing some things, let's get rid of the characters no one really remembers (Frieda, Patty) and add a few of our favorites who weren't around for the original version (Peppermint Patty, Marcie, Woodstock.)

Charlie Brown Christmas
Purchase from Amazon
Jonah Hill

Charlie Brown: Jonah Hill

His big round head was born to play this part.

Beverly Hills Chihuahua

Snoopy: Beverly Hills Chihuaha

Much better dancer than Zach Efron, who also wanted the role.

Michael Cera

Linus van Pelt: Michael Cera

Hoodies are the new security blanket.

Sarah Silverman

Lucy van Pelt: Sarah Silverman

No one brings a lighter touch to chronic sibling abuse than Sarah.

Chloe Sevigny

Sally Brown: Chloe Sevigny

Blonde, laid back, totally willing to wear silly pink dresses? Chloe, you got the part!

Jonas Brothers

Schroeder: The Jonas Brothers

Sorry, Lucy, they're waiting until marriage.

Lindsay Lohan

Peppermint Patty: Lindsay Lohan

Peppermint Patty's definitely the Peanuts character most likely to hijack an SUV.

Keanu Reeves

Marcie: Keanu Reeves

Oblivious, vaguely androgynous, with a completely inpenetrable glassy-eyed gaze? Hello, Keanu!

Robert Pattinson

Pig-Pen: Robert Pattinson

Rising star Pattinson claims he hasn't washed his hair in four years, so he may actually have to clean up for this role.

Philip Seymour Hoffman

Woodstock: Philip Seymour Hoffman

Promises to bring even more emotional nuance to Peanuts' most complex character. Also surprisingly good flier.

Natalya Rudakova

Little Red-haired Girl: Natalya Rudakova

First ever appearance by the Little Red-haired Girl: Now we know why Charlie Brown has been pining for her after all these years.

Have a better casting choice in mind for a role? Tell us!



Post this article to: Digg | del.icio.us | Facebook | MySpace | StumbleUpon | Fark | Reddit

User Comments

Please Log in or register to comment on A Charlie Brown Christmas: Time for a Hollywood Remake?.
  • LostInFilm

    12/22/08 01:22 PM
    Yes, Justin Timberlake would be a great Schroeder.
    Rowan Atkinson, aka Mr. Bean would be a great choice, if you wanted a humanized Snoopy. Imagine him in a Sopwith Camel.
    I'm stumped for who could play a better Peppermint Patty's "friend", Marcie. Who's been Lindsay leading lady lately? (love that alliteration)
    Robert Pattinson's hair might make him a good Woodstock, as well.
    Sarah Silverman is an awesome choice for Lucy.
    Review Rating: +1
    Characters remaining:
    Submit Cancel
  • kharrington

    12/19/08 02:21 PM
    Timberlake as Schroeder!
    Review Rating: +1
    Characters remaining:
    Submit Cancel
NEW MOVIE RELEASES
2009 |  2010 |  2011 |  2012
PAGES ON OUR
© 2009 ReelzChannel