Christian Bale

... as Bruce Wayne/Batman in The Dark Knight

Many describe me as a "bold girl," so I decided to get the most controversial pick out of the way first. Yeah, it turns out Bruce Wayne is a bit of a yeller ... who knew? Yes, I heard the whole rant and, yes, I was amazed at how it never seemed to end.

However, I'm gonna be honest with you; I like my actors a little crazy. Just like I like my wide receivers a little outlandish. Seriously, I'd be disappointed if T.O. didn't start sobbing on the podium or start screaming at his own teammates on the sidelines. So why would it be any different for Bale? The man is a committed, passionate actor who played Batman with range we've never seen. Suddenly, Batman had nuance, depth, subtext, and finally some real sex appeal.

I mean, I love ya, Val, but you never took my breath away. Plus Bale's Welsh, and that's just hot. If I have to take a three-minute tantrum from a whack-job creative artist who looks like that and performs like that, I'll take it in a racing heartbeat. (Remember this is a "hot list" not "Who Would You Most Trust with Your 3-Year-Old Niece?" list.)

Robert Downey Jr.

... as Tony Stark in Iron Man

I never thought he'd be on this kind of list when he was stuck in jail, waiting for gruel and lights out, but amazingly he made it back. Welcome to the list, Robert Downey Jr. You sure did "iron" out the wrinkles....

If the Millionaire Matchmaker asked me to describe my perfect guy's personality, it would be that of Robert Downey Jr. He's witty, he's sarcastic, and he's gorgeous. Trust me, it means something when you're in the lowest depths of drug addiction and, literally, all of America is rooting for you to kick the habit, take a shower, and make a comeback. He's our male Britney Spears. (She may have shaved her head and terrified her own children, but we couldn't wait until she hit us, baby, one more time.) So thank you, Robert Downey Jr, for getting your act together and turning all that boyish, adorable charm into such a memorable character.

Gerard Butler

... as King Leonidas in 300

OK, these superhero boys have all been fine and dandy. But sometimes you're in the mood for some strong, dry whiskey and nothing else can soothe your soul. The morning after having been awed by Zack Snyder's breathtaking film and his heart-throb leading man Gerard Butler, I read The New York Times film review ... and realized that critics were stupid.

Look, I don't have time to fight with A.O. Scott about Frank Miller and his genius (although I'm sure some of you'd like a crack at it). This is not the "I'm Pretentious List." This is a "hot list." This is the "I want to throw myself at you, King Leo, and make strong warrior babies with your fine self" list. This is SPARTA!